Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
