i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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