yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
