So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
