Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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