He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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