I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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