she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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