Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
