I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
