38 yer olds are good kisserssss
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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