whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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