I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
