I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
