I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
