I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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