Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize