How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
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