Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
i've created a new STD.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
