i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
