doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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