it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize