He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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