Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
