whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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