he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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