sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
