So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize