bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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