do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
