..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
