Pants 0. Shit 1.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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