OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
The adults are the big ones right?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
