bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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