There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
