the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize