bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
