seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
