I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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