Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize