dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
