i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
