Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
