We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize