New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
