Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
