I hate your face
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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