she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
