Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
