So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
